Mountain Dew Dissolves Mice, Can Vaporize Your Intestinal Tract

Grant J. Kidney — Here’s a real shocker for all of you unhealthy soda drinkers out there- Mountain Dew has the power to dissolve mice.

Earlier this year a man reported to have discovered a mouse in his can of Mountain Dew. After a lawsuit was filed and a request made for up to $50,000 in ‘damages’, a lawyer representing Pepsi Co. defended the mega company, stating that it was outright impossible for a mouse to have been found in a can of Mountain Dew as the rodent would’ve long been turned in to a ‘jelly like substance’.

It seems that Pepsi Co. has bitten off more than it can chew with their accidental revelation of how harmful the chemicals may be in every can of soda produced. However this wouldn’t be the first time that Pepsi Co. has fallen under intense scrutiny. Perhaps the most morbid and detestable of business practices ever adopted, Pepsi has been caught dumping aborted fetuses into their soft drinks.

Just to illustrate how powerful the phosphoric acid is found in every can of Mountain Dew, the U.S. Navy actually uses the very same chemical to blast rust away from battleships! Think- if Mountain Dew is powerful enough to dissolve rust, just what in the hell does it do to your intestines?

In the following clip, ‘Health Ranger’ Mike Adams and a co-host break down the ‘Mountain Dew mouse’ controversy in a rather hilarious way.

You may also enjoy: