The City Bus: Turds, Weirdos, and Scumbags

Grant J. Kidney— Ever ride the city bus? I have- and quite frequently in recent times since my girlfriend hasn’t a bicycle and is thus incapable of going where I go on bike.

I live in Des Moines, Iowa, a town who’s population isn’t as scum-ridden as some of the larger metropolitan areas. Nevertheless, Des Moines, like all other cities, is home to some of the strangest of creatures one will ever behold in their lives- and they all ride the city bus.

Stranger on a Strange Bus

As I walked upon the bus earlier this day, I couldn’t find a seat as all were occupied by folks who either had missing teeth, messed up hair, clubbed feet, or any combination thereof. There were even some who took up two seats either because they were greedy or just outright obese.

Seeing obviously visible, unoccupied seats that I just couldn’t have, I soon thought of myself as the new Rosa Parks- only this wasn’t a black/white issue- it was a selfish/kindness issue.

Not having a seat, I had to stand and hang on for dear life as the quasi-sane bus driver put the peddle to the metal,  rushing right through various red  lights and stop signs. I thought I was going to pass out from all the g-force.

Just as things seemed to have settled down, a whiny infant began crying at the top of its lungs. The suckling carried on for what seemed to be hours. I thought, don’t these people have enough money to buy a pacifier for this kid? And then I remembered that I was on the city bus. So the answer to that question was probably no.

Victims of Culture

This is not a rant against the folks who ride city busses- for they are mere victims of a culture in utter decay. Those who should be blamed for my ill experience today are the elite social planners of this world who’ve single-handedly orchestrated this great collapse of civilization transpiring right before my eyes.

Environment shapes reality. If a culture is run by an aberrant, selfish elite who care solely for the gross accumulation of profit and little else, that culture will invariably reflect the values of its rulers.

I feel bad for all the undereducated, sub-par crackheads who’s idea of fun it is congregating outside of convenience stores and hollering deep  into the night like a barbaric pack of apes.

I wish I could just walk up to these people with a bullet proof, samurai-esque uniform on and explain the deep mysteries of quantum mechanics. A little education can go a long way, don’t ya know.

Change society’s values, revamp the education system, create equal access to abundance for all people everywhere, and folks such as myself would never have to worry about the city bus people ever again.

Band-aid measures like passing new laws restricting folks from going out in public without their shirts on wont solve the big issue at hand. A stronger police presence wont solve the big issue at hand. We need a complete and total overhaul of our culture- then our problems will cease to be.

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